technology

I’m famous because I can’t spell

technology

Out of 32,300 web pages, Googleâ„¢ ranks my site #1 for the key words, “Zimmerman Telegraph.” Check it out here I was impressed with my awesome web presence, but was saddened when I realized it’s spelled, “Zimmermann.” On the other hand, Googleâ„¢ can only find 13,500 pages with the correct spelling. I may have mispelled [...]

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MySpace is video crack for egotist with low self esteem.

favorites

A few things I’ve absorbed from MySpace: The number of “Friends” in a MySpace profile is a direct correlation to the number of hours logged on to the internet and inversely related to that person’s actual social skill. The beacon enlightens me how unproductive we humans have become. When my beacon is on, I feel [...]

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Subtextual Translations

technology

When people answer a question by saying, “That’s a good question!” SUBTEXT TRANSLATION: “I have no fucking clue!” New York City is by far the best city to live in as long as you never make a mistake. (ie forget to pay the meter, park in front of a fire hydrant, neglect a parking ticket, [...]

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Stormtrooper TK-421′s Response to Obi-Wan’s Death

himself
Thumbnail image for Stormtrooper TK-421′s Response to Obi-Wan’s Death

Within 24 hours of Obi-Wan Kenobi's death, Death Star stormtroopers began to post “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. ~Yoda” on their Helmetbook© wall.

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jpegs, mpegs, and who-gives-a-fuck-pegs.

technology

At my brother’s wedding in Texas, I was the only one without a digital camera. I felt like I was at a farmer’s market, watching everybody showing their produce. Shoot, pose, show…pose, shoot, show…show, shoot, pose. A monotonous Factory of Fun. The “Present” was slipping away, while everyone was peering into the “Past”. “Like sands [...]

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