science

Stars are Born In Cold Interstellar Clouds

politics

Universal Ultimate Court Judges ruled unanimously in favor of giving nebulae clouds the right to abort a star in the controversial Roe Nebula vs. Wade Star Cluster. In a similar case, the Court denied the Schiavo Nebula the right to reactivate the Artificial Hydrogen-Fusion Particle Generator in one of their stars, which has sustained the [...]

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I Love Aluminum

science

I just watched a commercial showing women seductively inhaling different forms of aluminum (tin foil, fences, a baseball bat, etc ). I guess the makers of AXE deodorant are implying that since their product is housed in an aluminum can that it produces a potent sexual elixir that simulates the pheromones that attract females. At [...]

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Fun Facts: Sharks are immune to cancer…

science

and…koala bears are immune to AIDS. That’s great news for those cuddly, snuggly, eucalyptus-eating teddy bears! Unfortunately, truck stop bathrooms in the Outback are becoming unprotected marsupial orgies and now that the fear of sharing needles has been lifted, Melbourne morgues are becoming overwhelmed by dead koala bears overdosed on heroin. *****BREAKING NEWS******* Read this [...]

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Virgin Komodo Dragon Named Flora Gives Birth

science

I just read on CNN that a virgin Komodo dragon named Flora gave birth today. Parthenogenesis is the best word to decribe this “miracle”. partheno-genesis (pär‘thÉ™nōjÄ•n‘É™sÄ­s) [Greek,=virgin-birth] Another parthenogenetic species is the whiptail lizard, these creatures survive with an entirely female population sans males. This colony of fatherless, Amazonian lizards are able to create life [...]

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Cows Causes Baldness

food

The milk industry claims its bovine breast beverage fortified with vitamin D, “Does the body good.” Vitamin D is essential for absorbing calcium which helps our bodies build strong bones and teeth. However, some studies show dairy consumption leads to certain types of cancer. Granted, these specific dairy products come from cows amped up the [...]

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