Join Dan's Facebook Page


people

Another MySpace Profile

people

“I have a golden retriever named Angel who, to me, really is made of gold. Angel and I live together like sisters in an amparment that only I pay for. I am a model who doesn’t believe that beauty can be seen by one’s eyes. I think it is possible that even a blind person [...]

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Why am I white?

people

I was at my Jamaican friend’s house and his five year old daughter Cheyenne asked me bluntly, “Why are you so white?”
At first it seemed like an easy question but I quickly realized that I didn’t have an answer and said, “I don’t know.”
To which she replied, “Do you lotion?”
I then said, “No.”
She rolled her [...]

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My great-grandfather invented the paper clip.

people

Big fucking deal, my great-great-great-Uncle Angelo invented rice.
Do you know how much residuals he gets just from Chinatown?
He makes Bill Gates look like white trash.
Beat that bitch!

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SAD People are pathetic!

people

I’m so glad it’s hot again. Not because I especially like sweating, I like when it gets warmer because people who claim to be “suffering” from SAD aren’t whining as much.
seasonal affective disorder
n. (Abbr. SAD)
A form of depression occurring at certain seasons of the year, especially when the individual has less exposure to sunlight.
“It’s sooo [...]

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I Miss the 80′s

people

I was watching an old episode of Miami Vice and I realized the biggest thing that I miss from the 80′s are hookers.
Damn that Giuliani!

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Disoriented Tourist

overheard nyc

Whenever, I surface from the subways, and confidently head in one direction on an avenue. Inevitably, someone walking beside will notice my keen navigational skill and will ask me, “Are we going up or down?”
I have two responses:
1. “Actually we are going horizontal. Our vertical displacement is zero. What are you stupid?” Then [...]

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I Feel For Future Digital Anthropologist Deciphering MySpace Comments

people

I’m guessing THE PRINCE’s “hit me back” is implying: Since he feels it’s perfectly normal to hit a women if she gets out of line then she should feel free to “hit him back” if he does the same. He’s no hypocrite (respect).
Now the Sultan comment was much harder to unravel. At first glance I [...]

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