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danisms

If pediatricians are doctors who treat children and pedophiles are adults who are attracted to children…

danisms

…then pedestrians are people who ride children.
Furthermore, if octopus means “eight-legged” and Oedipus means “swollen foot” shouldn’t an iPod be called an iPus.

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The Phrase “Flame Retardant” is a Little Harsh

danisms

I like to say, “My pet ant is a homosexual with a learning disablity”.

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Do cucumber farmers eventually become gay?

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Anyone can master digital wizardry…

danisms

…I want to master digital necromancy. Who cares if you can Photoshop? I will be able to resurrect my dead computer into a zombie computer.

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If a person who balloons is called a balloonist and a person who bicycles is called a bicyclist…

danisms

…shouldn’t a person who races be called a bigot*.
*I guess that makes sense because most people I know who are NASCAR fans are racists.

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