Dan Allen is a NYC-based comedian and writer. He has appeared on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend® and is currently writing Kevin Bacon’s biography in the sixth person.
His past…
Dan was born in Daytona Beach, Florida, land of NASCAR zealots, brawling bikers, and drunken college kids. If the Renaissance was the rebirth of learning in Europe, Daytona Beach has been going through a period of an Unrenaissance which crucifies culture. His family moved around a lot and they eventually landed in a trailer park in San Antonio, Texas. Alienated for reading, Dan dreamt of becoming a Mars colonist and escaping this miserable, blue ellipsoid called Earth.
He graduated from Robert E. Lee High School, joined the Air Force Reserves and enrolled in Aerospace Engineering at Texas A&M University. Unfortunately, his interplanetary self-exiling fantasy died the day he was enlightened that he was too tall for the Space Shuttle’s height restriction. Standing six inches shy of seven feet, NASA refused to cater to his elongated, ectomorphic skeletal specifications.
Disheartened, he completed his military obligation as an Air Transportation Specialist (Air Force codeword for: forklift driver) and moved to Virginia Beach to work for his uncle’s pawnshop. He quickly mastered the craft of reading people, and was offered his own store. However, karmically the transactions weighed heavy on his heart, and he politely refused.
Miraculously, Dan found comedy, moved to NYC and landed a spot on Comedy Central.
