I am a vegan
Pure, Organic
Meek, Malnourished
Chickpeas are my meat pellets
Tofu is my life
The art of vegetarianism is pacifism between furry organisms
A Denny’s Grand Slam is a dinner of Death!
Two slices of pig skin, a couple chicken fetuses
Sunny-side up and side of toast…please
A carton of eggs is not what I see
Twelve homemade coffins for under two bucks
Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O…and on this farm he had a chicken…
…but that doesn’t matter anymore, because an Egg McMuffin is much more important than a chicken well versed in Euclidean geometry. The poultry populous is eternally damned .
Mortally assassinated.
Painfully annihilated.
Pathetically depopulated.Kill the chicken…kill…kill the chicken!
But I digress
I must confess
My body yearns for bacon
My head is throbbing
I must give in
To my paganistic, carnivorous desire of flesh
Give me some bacon and let the pig bleed!









