My Bitchy Girlfriend is a Hemophiliac

Pale, Anemic

Extremely vindictive

A pampered princess whose blood that does not clot

Nagging, Grating, Whining

Very maternal

The misery must stop

I prepared a meal laden with garlic

And a dash of resentment

I switched her toothbrush from

Soft bristle to hard

Unaware of my subterfuge

My problem is solved

MySpace is video crack for egotist with low self esteem.

favorites

A few things I’ve absorbed from MySpace: The number of “Friends” in a MySpace profile is a direct correlation to the number of hours logged on to the internet and inversely related to that person’s actual social skill. The beacon enlightens me how unproductive we humans have become. When my beacon is on, I feel [...]

If Leia and Luke had a Child

favorites

One year after Emperor Palpatine’s death (1 A.B.Y) Ancient Massassi temple on Yavin IV (Fourth moon of Yavin) Medical facility in the New Republic base 2-1B MEDICAL DROID His midi-clorians level is off the charts, over 21,000. Unfortunately, he also has an extra chromosome. LEIA What does that mean, Two Onebee? 2-1B It means he [...]

Proper Etiquette of Toothpicking Cheese Cubes 101

favorites

I played basketball today and realized I was extremely hungry. I dipped into Gourmet Garage to buy something to eat. I didn’t know what I wanted, so I roamed aimlessly around until I found something. Luckily, The cheese department had five platters of cheese cubes with a cup of toothpicks. Famished, I plucked out a [...]

My Bitchy Girlfriend is a Hemophiliac

danisms

Recent Posts

MySpace is video crack for egotist with low self esteem.

If Leia and Luke had a Child

God Hates Eggs

Proper Etiquette of Toothpicking Cheese Cubes 101