January 2010

New Abortion Groups

politics

Ever since the Roe vs. Wade case, the topic of abortion has been a heated debate between two factions: Pro-Life opponents of the legalization of abortion and Pro Choice advocates of the legalization of abortion. Two new groups have developed recently: Pro-Create a group of Catholic missionaries living in Tahiti who are advocates of promiscuious [...]

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I Love Aluminum

science

I just watched a commercial showing women seductively inhaling different forms of aluminum (tin foil, fences, a baseball bat, etc ). I guess the makers of AXE deodorant are implying that since their product is housed in an aluminum can that it produces a potent sexual elixir that simulates the pheromones that attract females. At [...]

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Perseverance Pays Off

wordplay

That’s great if you were born with a lot of “Perseverance” My parents didn’t have any “Perseverance”, I had to earn my own And when I finally produced enough “Perseverance” to pay “Off”, I got in trouble. “Off” turned out to be a goddamned whistle blower. An informer. The little bastard. “Off”icer Tattle-Tale had the [...]

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MTA Lies!!

mathematics

I bought an “Unlimited” Monthly MetroCard for only $70. What a fucking steal! An infinite amount of rides would reduce the normal $2 fare down to less than a trillionth of a penny. Idiots! I would be able to go any where…at anytime. The deception was revealed, when I mistakenly entered a DOWNTOWN entrance and [...]

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I Have a Sexual Confession

religion

I’ve developed a fetish for Jewish girls (aka Matzah Ball Fever). To be more specific, Sephardic Jews (“Jews of the Spanish rite”) over Ashkenazi Jews (“Jews of the German rite”). I’m guessing that my preferential attraction for Sephardic women derives from my upbringing in south Texas and I’ve always had an affinity for Hispanic women. [...]

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