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I’d like to share a poem with you

by Dan Allen on November 22, 2009

My MySpace Experience

Who the fuck is that bitch on your Top 8?
Who?
You know what slut I’m talking about.
Who?
The one with no clothes on.
Oh, that one.

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Producing a Comedy Show in NYC
Producing Tips

There are only a 1,000 comedians living in NYC out of the 8 million people in the five boroughs. That means we each get 8,000 a piece. Personally, I only want 1,000 True Fans.
Why only 1,000? Here’s a quote from Kevin Kelly, the founder of Wired,
A creator, such as an artist, musician, photographer, craftsperson, [...]

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Raised as fat, capitalistic pigs with intrinsic senses of entitlement, we forget that our problems are insignificant when compared to other citizens of this planet.
I was at LaGuardia Airport last week during the blackout and overheard a hysterical woman speaking to a reporter amongst crying babies and other stranded passengers tearfully cry out, “It’s [...]

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“There’s a New Monorail in Town, Springfield!”
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There is a fairly new (two year old) monorail from Manhattan to JFK called the AirTrain®. Which is great because it cuts the commute time in half.

“Monorail, Monorail,Monorail, Monorail…Can you hear it, Manhattan?!”
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Proper Etiquette of Toothpicking Cheese Cubes 101
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I played basketball today and realized I was extremely hungry. I dipped into Gourmet Garage to buy something to eat. I didn’t know what I wanted, so I roamed aimlessly around until I found something.
Luckily, The cheese department had five platters of cheese cubes with a cup of toothpicks.
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MoMAudio is Horseshit
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MoMA offers a free audio tour to “help” visitors understand what the artist is trying to express.
While helpful with some, you end up looking like a jackass to those brave souls who ventured forth sans audio guidance as you stare at an untitled canvas painted blue by Yves Klein for five minutes listening to a [...]

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danisms
“I need to work on my quads, my agent called me and said they needed a leg model for a film about FDR.”
by Danocrates Allenopolos

I’d like to share a poem with you

Recent Posts

Producing a Comedy Show in NYC

Earthlings (specifically Americans) Are Spoiled

“There’s a New Monorail in Town, Springfield!”

Proper Etiquette of Toothpicking Cheese Cubes 101

MoMAudio is Horseshit

danisms