Pale, Anemic
Extremely vindictiveA pampered princess whose blood that does not clot
Nagging, Grating, Whining
Very maternalThe misery must stop
I prepared a meal laden with garlic
And a dash of resentmentI switched her toothbrush from
Soft bristle to hard
Unaware of my subterfuge
My problem is solved
My Bitchy Girlfriend is a Hemophiliac
June 25th, 2007 | poetry
7 comments ↓
Hoorah, no one liked that bitch, anyway.
girls can’t be hemophiliacs, but I’m sure you know that and this is still funny.
Yikes!
My current girlfriend (not the one that bled to death) enlightened me this morning with the same information.
Why am I the only one not in “the know”?
You want the truth on that? You didn’t see, when you were 11, the made-for-tv movie “Go Toward the Light”, starring Linda Hamilton and Richard “John Boy” Thomas as the Mormon parents of a little boy who got AIDS from his hemophilia treatment. And you probably didn’t tape it and watch it over and over and cry, either. Somewhere in there, before the little boy (spoiler alert!) goes toward the light, they mention that the gene for hemophilia is only expressed in males. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095225/
Well…good day, my lady. I can\’t believe I missed that. Especially, since I was a Mormon in kindergarten. Two Elders would ride their bicycles over to our house every Monday. Fortunately, my Mom wised up once the Stepford-like wives started to guilt her into more and more functions. My Dad on the otherhand, loved it. Thanks for the hemophiliac low-down.
Okay, begin geekdom.
I don’t know what these people are talking about. Women, as carriers and providers of an X chromosome, typically PASS on the gene for hemophilia (which is on the X chromosome), but they most certainly CAN have it, too. That is one of the first things you learn about in gene information in biology class. God.
http://www.projectredflag.org/common_questions/women_girls_hemophilia.htm
http://www.kidshealth.org/teen/diseases_conditions/blood/hemophilia.html
The second link provides the scientific reasoning: “Although girls rarely develop the symptoms of hemophilia itself, they can be carriers of the disease. For a girl to get hemophilia, she would have to receive the disease on the chromosome she receives from her father, who would have hemophilia, as well as from the X chromosome of her mother, who would be a carrier. Although this is not impossible, it is highly unlikely.”
And while highly unlikely, it has happened before. Wikipedia has the extra tidbit of “Haemophiliac daughters are more common than they once were, as improved treatments for the disease have allowed more haemophiliac males to survive to adulthood and become parents.”
End geeky biological lesson.
Never mind about Hemophilia. I’m concerned about your relationship.
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